The Wipers Times
was a trench magazine that was published by British soldiers fighting in the
Ypres Salient during the First World War.
In early 1916, the
12th Battalion, Sherwood Foresters, was stationed in the front line at Ypres,
Belgium, and came across a printing press abandoned by a Belgian who had, in
the words of the editor, "stood not on the order of his going, but
gone." A sergeant who had been a printer in peacetime salvaged it and
printed a sample page. The paper itself was named after Tommy slang for Ypres
itself:
THE B.E.F. TIMES. with
which are incorporated The Wipers Times, The "New Church" Times, The
Kemmel Times & The Somme Times.
Publication was
held up after February 1918 by the German offensive on the western front in
that year, but at the end of the War two issues of "The Better Times"
were published. The second of these was billed as the "Xmas, Peace and
Final Number."
The names of the
staff involved in the paper are mostly unrecorded. The editor was Captain
(later Lieutenant-Colonel) F. J. Roberts (Frederick John Roberts), MC, the
sub-editor was Lieutenant (later Lieutenant-Colonel) J. H. Pearson (John Hesketh
("Jack") Pearson), DSO, MC. A notable contributor to the paper was
Artilleryman Gilbert Frankau. Also worthy of note are the engravings by E.J.
Couzens; his portrait of a chinless platoon commander clutching his cane and
wondering "Am I as offensive as I might be?" became the paper's
motif.
Most other
contributors from the Division used pseudonyms: some now obscure; some intended
to satirize contemporary newspaper pundits such as William Beach Thomas (of the
Daily Mail) and Hilaire Belloc; and some ironic, such as P.B.I. (Poor Bloody
Infantry).
The paper consisted
of poems, reflections, wry in-jokes and lampoons of the military situation the
Division was in. In general the paper maintained a humorously ironic style that
today can be recognised in satirical magazines such as The Duffel Blog, Private
Eye, Le Canard enchaîné and The Onion.
The covers of each
issue were mock adverts, richly typeset, for war-related music-hall
extravaganzas. A few samples (not richly typeset) are given below:
Cloth Hall.
Ypres.
Great Attraction This Week
Messrs. INFANTRY, ARTILLERY &
Co.
Present their Screamingly Funny
Farce,
Entitled:
"BLUFF"
THIS FARCE
PROMISES TO BE A GREAT SUCCESS AND A LONG RUN IS
EXPECTED
"DEAD COW FARM"
CINEMA
THIS WEEK
GRAND OPENING NIGHT
THIS MARVELLOUS
PLACE ERECTED AT FABULOUS EXPENSE WILL OPEN
ON THURSDAY NEXT WITH THE WONDERFUL
FILM
"HE DIDN'T WANT TO DO
IT."
FEATURING
"WATA FUNK" The
Conscientious Objector.
OTHER ITEMS.
-o-o-o-o-
PEEPS THROUGH A SNIPERS COPE.
-o-o-o-o-
FLOUNDERS IN FLANDERS.
THE CALLANSEEUM
PALACE OF VARIETIES
SPECIAL ENGAGEMENT OF THE AERIAL TROUPE
"THE FLYING PIGS"
FILM FARCE, ENTITLED :-
"TICKLING FRITZ"
by the P.B.I. Film
Co., of the United Kingdom and Canada
BOOK EARLY. CHARGES MOBILE.
There were also
sales of no-man's land:
BUILDING LAND FOR SALE
BUILD THAT HOUSE
ON
HILL 60.
BRIGHT-BREEZY-
&
INVIGORATING
COMMANDS AN EXCELLENT VIEW OF
HISTORIC TOWN OF YPRES.
FOR PARTICULARS OF SALE
APPLY:-
BOSCH & CO MENIN.
or the front-line
at Ypres salient itself:
FOR SALE
THE SALIENT ESTATE
COMPLETE IN EVERY DETAIL
INTENDING PURCHASERS WILL BE SHOWN ROUND
ANYTIME DAY OR NIGHT
UNDERGROUND RESIDENCES READY FOR
HABITATION
Splendid Motoring Estate! Shooting
Perfect !!
Fishing Good!!!
NOW'S THE TIME. HAVE A STAKE IN THE COUNTRY.
NO REASONABLE OFFER
REFUSED,
DO FOR HOME FOR INEBRIATES OR OTHER
CHARITABLE INSTITUTION.
Delay is Dangerous! You might miss
it!!
Apply for particulars etc.,
to
Thomas, Atkins, Sapper &
Co., Zillebeke
and Hooge.
HOUSEBREAKERS:
WOOLEY, BEAR, CRUMP & CO. TELEGRAMS:
"ADSUM, WIPERS"
The daily concerns
of trench soldiers all make an appearance in the articles, sometimes explicit
and sometimes as in-jokes for which outsiders would not have the key.
Shelling (whether
from the enemy or one's own side): is referred to all through the magazine.
There are occasional small ads purportedly from Minnie (German trench mortar)
to Flying Pig (British ditto) and various poems complaining about, or
apologising for, incidents where British guns shelled their own lines.
Sex: the
collections of pornography known to the Division as "The Munque Art
Gallery" and "Kirschner's" are frequently mentioned and
occasionally advertised, as are the local brothels: the Fancies, the Poplar
tree and Plug Street.
Drink: the continued
supply of rum and whiskey was a prime concern for all at the front. In one
serial story, Narpoo Rum, a certain 'Herlock Shomes' spent five issues tracking
rum-thieves round Hooge. Brief references also turn up to panic buying of
supplies by unnamed individuals in the Division after rumours of a whisky
drought.
Rats: these bred in
enormous numbers in the trenches, chiefly fed on corpses but with an eye for
anything left in a dugout. One poem in the paper describes how a rat and his
wife opened a tin of sardines, ate the contents then sealed the tin back up for
the author to find.
The reality of life
in the trenches rarely breaks through what the editor termed the paper's
'hysterical hilarity' but when it does, the gallows humour is clear and may
appear callous to modern eyes. One example is a quote from an article in a
British national newspaper about a bungled trench-raid, followed by a sharp
comment from the editor of the Wipers Times:
"...They
climbed into the trench and surprised the sentry, but unfortunately the
revolver which was held to his head missed fire. Attempts were made to throttle
him quietly, but he succeeded in raising the alarm, and had to be killed."
This we consider real bad luck for the sentry after the previous heroic efforts
to keep him alive.
Another such, from
the column "Verbatim Extracts from Intelligence Summaries" reads as
follows:
"At 10 p.m.
the "Flying Pig" dropped a round in our front line at X 9 D 5 2. The
trench was completely wrecked—the crater formed being 14 feet deep and 25 feet
across. It is consoling to think that over 40 rounds have been fired from this gun
into the enemy trenches during the last week."
(Very consoling to
the P.B.I.)
Even the weather
wasn't immune to it, if you wanted to lay odds on the forecasts:
5 to 1 Mist
11 to 2 East Wind
or Frost
8 to 1 Chlorine.
Much of the copy
submitted by soldiers of the Division was poetry. Some was good, some was
doggerel and occasional pieces were excellent: but not all was welcome. The
fourth issue contained this notice from the editor:
"We regret to
announce that an insidious disease is affecting the Division, and the result is
a hurricane of poetry. Subalterns have been seen with a notebook in one hand,
and bombs in the other absently walking near the wire in deep communication
with their muse. Even Quartermasters with "books, note, one" and "pencil,
copying" break into song while arguing the point re "boots. gum,
thigh". The Editor would be obliged if a few of the poets would break into
prose as the paper cannot live by poems alone."
Nonetheless, much
of the space in the paper was taken up by poems. Two typical examples are given
below.
Realizing Men must
laugh,
Some Wise Man
devised the Staff : Dressed them up in little dabs Of rich variegated tabs :
Taught them how to win the War On A.F.Z. 354 : Let them lead the Simple Life
Far from all our vulgar strife : Nightly gave them downy beds For their weary,
aching heads : Lest their relatives might grieve Often, often gave them leave,
Decorations too, galore : What on earth could man wish more? Yet, alas, or so
says Rumour,
He forgot a sense
of Humour!
The world wasn't
made in a day,
And Eve didn't
ride on a bus, But most of the world's in a sandbag,
The rest of its
plastered on us.
The paper is
sprinkled with small paragraphs and half-column articles such as "People
We Take Our Hats Off To" (frequently the French), "Things We Want to
Know", "Answers to Correspondents" and small ads. Some were
obviously spoofs:
LONELY PRESIDENT
wishes correspond with anyone.
Can write charming
note. Has corresponded with most of the crowned heads of Europe.-
Write
"Dignitas,"Washington, U.S.A.
To Subaltern: Yes,
every junior officer may carry a F.M.'s baton in his knapsack, but we think
you'll discard that to make room for an extra pair of socks before very long.
TO LET-;Fine
freehold estate in salubrious neighbourhood. Terms moderate. Owner going east
shortly.-;Apply Bosch and Co., Messines.
While others were
not for outsiders:
Things We Want To Know
The name of the
celebrated infantry officer who appears daily in the trenches disguised as a
Xmas tree.
How much money
changed hands when it was known that he didn't get married on leave.
Whether a certain
officer is shortly publishing a little song entitled "Why was I so
careless with the boots."
To
Troubled.-;Certainly think you have just complaint against people in the next
dugout, and if you care to take the matter further there is no doubt you will
get damages. It certainly was scandal if, as you affirm, the picture was one of
Kirschner's.
We regret a
further rise in property today.
No comments:
Post a Comment